Cloth Diapers, Day 2

Torah and I have ended our second day of cloth diapers with a small load waiting in the dryer. I actually feel good about this. I can't put my finger on why, but it's a feeling of knowing things are okay....? I don't know if anyone can relate, and if you can please comment.

I have been thinking a lot about things lately. Things like what I want to study and be able to do as a career. I know I plan on being a stay at home mom/wife but if my husband ever cannot work, or if -and let's pray it's not the case- he passes on young, I want to be able to provide for my family. I had been thinking and thinking until it finally hit me that I would love to be a teacher. I think history would be fun, but a language teacher would also be pretty cool. Either of those, though I do not want to be a P.E. coach.... haha!

Another one of the things that I have been pondering on is ways of helping my David more. With the baby requiring most, if not all of my attention, it is very difficult to focus on the man I love. I wish I could do more for him, yet I have no idea how since I can't even feed myself at times. I have noticed that handling the baby has gotten easier little by little, as I get more used to it, so I'm hoping it'll be the same with David.

And lastly, I have an adorable baby, so here, have a picture~

Look at her rocking those Bottombumpers~

Cloth Diapers~!

Many have looked at me as if I were an alien or completely fake looking plastic Japanese lizard monster when I tell them about how I'm going to be cloth diapering with my first kid. It might have something to do with me being barely 20, or with it being my first kid, or maybe even with it being 2013. What some people don't get though, is that this isn't your grandma's cloth diapering. Today, due to innovations in cloths and detergents, as well as many creative products for cloth diapering, it is very simple to choose cloth diapers over disposables. Specially looking at all the incentives for choosing cloth~

First we have the obvious reason, and why I looked into them in the first place: environmentally friendly. On average a child uses between 6400-6500 disposable diapers before they are potty trained. Each of those diapers takes 500 years to decompose, and you as a woman are not helping with your monthly contribution of sanitary napkins.

The other reason, which I found out soon after looking around the cloth diaper community, is the gentleness to your wallet. Yes, it might seem like a lot to pay for one diaper, with the prices of cloth diapers being between 12 and 35 dollars, but lets take a look at the previous numbers shall we? If your child will need 6000 or so diapers, the average price PER DIAPER is 20cents. Let us multiply .20 by 6,000......  and get 1,200. It's a pretty big number when compared to the 200-700 you'd have to invest in cloth diapers and accessories. You will be paying between 1200 and 2000 dollars for something that is polluting the Earth, costing you trash bags, and is harmful to your child.

Yes, you heard me, harmful. There are chemicals in disposable diapers that were banned in feminine pads due to causing shock syndrome. Why the heck are they still in a product we use for our babies!? Other chemicals in disposables have been suspected of causing infertility in boys, as well as being responsible for skin rashes.

A fourth reason, if those weren't enough to explain myself, is that they look darn adorable on my little girl, and so they will look adorable on your little one too. They come in so many different prints, patterns, colors, and styles. Some even come with ruffles or pockets!

To recap, cloth diapers are cuter and better for your wallet, your baby, and the world. You and your child would be saving the world, one cute booty cover at a time.

If you'd like to learn more about cloth diapers just visit the links below or leave a comment. I might be new with this, but that's the best time to ask since I'm asking around myself! If I don't know the answer right off the top of my head, I will talk to my friends who have cloth diapered multiple children- and with the same set of cloth diapers might I add, meaning more savings for you!

The three brands I like, since I use AIOs (All In One)
http://www.thirstiesbaby.com/

http://www.bottombumpers.com/  The Bottombumpers are actually my favorite up to now. I have 20 of their one size AIOs and they dry quickly as well as feel great.

http://www.gro-via.com/ And lastly GroVia, which has a large selection, from prefolds to one size AIOs, they're were you want to go if you are new to cloth diapering and looking for which option is better for you.

Some informational stuff~
http://www.cottonbabies.com/clothdiapers.php

http://www.kellyscloset.com/Cloth-Diaper-Information_ep_34-1.html

You can also find some cute stuff and other ladies who cloth diaper by following certain tags on social networking websites. e.g. #clothdiapers #clothdiapering  and such.

If you have been converted to the cloth side, don't worry, we have pretties~ and good luck.

If you still prefer the convenience and extra time that disposables provide you with, then that's cool too! I'm just not willing to trade all that other stuff for those two things, but hey, just like breastfeeding isn't for everyone, cloth diapering isn't either.

Congrats on your amazing little treasure, that leaves little treasure for you to change.

She's Here!

On Saturday July 6th, 2013, Torah was born. Weighing in at seven pounds and 14 ounces, and 21 inches long, she was the most precious one of the cutest babies in the hospital~

I have been getting used to life with the new addition, and it's pretty hard. Not really as everyone told me, but more on my scheduling. I keep going without food for a whole day at times. I just forget to eat. It doesn't matter to me though. What I'm focused on is keeping Her happy and comfortable all the time. When she sleeps I try to get things done to keep my husband happy, and when she awakes again it's all her. Then my husband gets home and it's all about them. I don't think I will be able to make a schedule for myself again, at least not until She has a more defined one herself too.

I know I didn't update this while in the hospital like I said, but I had given up on her getting here before the induction so I wasn't ready. I hadn't packed my computer..... hehehe. Now though, I have this free time due to being in pain and granny taking care of Torah. Since I am in pain, waiting for the medication to kick in, I am also distracting myself with this. I am not sure what the harsh contraction like pains are, and I had my doctor say they were just because I wasn't taking it easy. I got told to try to be on "bed rest" but I hate that idea. Who will take care of my darling little bundle of cuteness? Who will pick up my loved bigger bundle of handsomeness' socks off the floor? Yeah, granny would volunteer but I would feel really bad......

Well, anyway, getting my boring stuff out of the way, here is what you were all waiting for! Adorable pictures of Torah! I should seriously try to get her to enter a baby pageant or something......

Waiting, Pains, and Induction~

I was in the hospital yesterday, Tuesday the 2nd, from pain in my pelvic area. I was dizzy, had a headache, and could barely walk. The pain would randomly spike up to unbearable, then back down to a little more than uncomfortable. If I was having any contractions, which I was told I was, I could not feel when they began and ended. I was admitted at 19:00 and taken to the L+D ward. They checked me, told me I was 1cm dilated, and waited and hour and a half to check again.  At 21:40, there was no change, so I was given a pain relieving and sleeping aid pill and sent home. I was finally able to sleep throughout the night! Yet, I woke up and getting out of bed and walking around hurts more than it did yesterday.

I went to my OB appointment at 10:20 today, Wednesday 3rd, and we decided to just go ahead and schedule me to be induced. She might come earlier than that, and my doctor believes that will be the case, but at least I know that it'll be at most one week. I feel better knowing that, and I also feel more prepared for it. It eases my nerves, even though I know she could come this evening! It's a strange thing.

Thanks for reading everyone, and have a free and beautiful and happy Independence Day.

P.S. If you'd like to check out my husband's Independence Day post, you can either click on the link to his blog which is somewhere in the left hand corner of this blog, OR~ click on the smiley face  OuO

Google it~

I have come to realize that maybe it's a good idea to try and keep certain things private. For example, your plans for baby care and parenting. I have had a lot of people flood me with questions about the whole cloth diapering thing, and I'm just here thinking, "Well, do what I did and google it."

That'd be a rude response though, and so I have to dig in my head for all the answers to their questions. I'm a new mom. New to breastfeeding, cloth diapering, and baby caring. Do you really think I have a secret answer you haven't been able to find? I understand them, I just wish they wouldn't make me feel so inadequate sometimes. I find myself thinking it might just be easier to go with formula and disposables and save myself the whole, "What about on long car rides? Will her clothes fit over that? Are you sure they're better? 15$ for a diaper is a bit much, no? What about when you can't breastfeed her? What will you do in public? She needs to bond with her father as well." and all the other things like that.

I am a very stubborn person, but if overwhelmed and overloaded, I will take the easier route. The path of least resistance. I will leave it all to others to make decisions for me, be it what I want or not at all, and will end up just going along with things. I do not want to do that when it comes to my children. I want to try my hardest for them, same way I try my hardest for my husband. In 5, 10, 20, 40 years I want to look at our kids and know that it's because of what WE as parents decided to teach them, and not because we were following an instruction manual.

Our kids were made from scratch and with a recipe of our own, with our Heavenly Father's help, and that's how we will raise them.

The Trollin' Baby~

Braxton hicks, alright, nothing new. Then they got stronger, and more even. We timed them for 2 hours, and they were each 3-4 minutes apart, and lasted 1.5 minutes. That should have been it right? Nope, this kid is a master trickster who just loves getting us excited for nothing. She's done this about 3 times and I'm a bit afraid that because of that I won't catch the actual birth in time. This is why I've been reading so much about the signs of labor and such, but it's still not too helpful since the only sure sign I can depend on is my water breaking. Anyone have any suggestions or ideas? The BHs are very much like what everyone says the real contractions feel like. They begin in my lower back and kinda just "wave" around to the front lower abdomen and pelvic area. I don't even know why I'm making a post about this......

On a bit of a nicer note, there was a mix up on our order of Thirsties AIO. I know, that's not good, but the store was so nice that they are not only going to fix the order and resend it, but they are also giving us 5 free diapers. I only ordered 4! That makes it 9 size ones for us, so we only have to buy about 4 or so more...... Yay! Now hopefully they get here before she does......

Check it guys!

Nourished and Nurtured: A Day in the Life of Our Homeschool (with a nearly...: My homeschool philosophy is based largely on Classical Education and Charlotte Mason . My daughter Alina is in first grade, studying readi...

This is a relative's blog that I thought I'd go ahead and check out, and guess what!? She's homeschooling, used cloth diapers, and is into blogging. I think I found  a blog that I will be reading every day. I just went through her parenting tab, and I like it. Specially the homeschooling- above link- and the Halloween Candy moderation.

She has things on healthy living, 2 books for sell, home cooking, and she's currently studying homeopathy   is that how it's spelled?   so if you're interested, check it out!

Marriage

You know, most people tell you that marriage is a giant thing. That it's a huge decision. That you should think about it. A lot of others tell you that you should have a degree and your life completely set up before you even consider marriage. That if you marry when you're under 25 then you're wasting away your life and dooming it to misery. Well...... someone isn't happy in their marriage. 

Thing is, no one tells you exactly what it entails! Why? Because it's what you make it. You won't end up the same way their uncle's nephew's cousin's friend's lawyer's bartender did. You will end up however you choose to. Yeah, it's not a direct choice because it's more of a mixture of consequences, but not all consequences are bad. 

A lot of people told me I was being stupid for getting married at 19 to a 22 year old with no college degree. People even brought up that no amount of "love" would be able to deal with his Aspergers. That I wasn't strong enough to deal with his disability. I fell in love with him because of who he is, and that includes everything about him. Yes, it was really hard finishing high school and planning a wedding during my spare time instead of "living the life" like most of the other seniors at school. Did I want to live that life though? Not really. 

Right now, my marriage entails waking up at 4:30am, helping my husband get ready for work, doing some early morning chores like putting on a wash of clothes and emptying the dishwasher before going back to bed. Then I wake up at 9am and have second breakfast because I'm a tall hobbit   take a shower, and pick up around our room, baby's room, and bathroom. Put the clothes in the dryer or hang them up to dry, put them away, rest a bit and blog, and then just wait for the love of my life to come home. 

We take a small nap together, and then talk and do finances or take care of things we need to do. Plan for the future, both long term and short term. Hang out at the mall because we're young enough to do that~ (just joking around, old couples should totally go clubbing and stuff.) 

Anyway, the reason I just told you about all that is because that's the average day for US. Not YOU. You might have a different schedule, have the husband as the one who stays at home, or both of you might work, or work from home. There is no set way marriage goes. There is no perfect marriage schedule to follow, or perfect whatever to go by. As long as you are both being smart about finances, being clean and keeping up with your home, and talking and communicating well, then you should be fine. The most important thing is that you both love each other truly, and let that love show. I clean up after David, picking up his dirty socks, his plate from the table after he finishes eating, and the trash he leaves behind him randomly. Does it bug me? Not really. I wish our trash cans weren't invisible to him, but meh~ 

In return, he helps me fold clothes, put things away I wouldn't be able to put away otherwise, comes with me to the doctor as boring as he finds it, and has been taking great care of me throughout our first pregnancy. He does a lot of other stuff, but if I write it all down he might realize how awesome he is and then his ego won't fit in the room. Two super awesome people together, it's lucky we haven't cause some sort of explosion in the universe yet.

The point I'm attempting, and failing, to get across is that yes, you should think about marriage very carefully but not in terms of "Am I too young?", "Is this the right time?", "What will people think?". Think more along the lines of:

-"How will I feel being with them constantly?"

-"Will I mind sharing a shower even though they hog the water?"

-"Do I love them enough to excuse anything they do to annoy me?"

Questions like those. Random things you don't really think about. Raising a child with them. Growing old together. Going through so very many ups and downs that you'd go crazy if you weren't holding on to your partner tightly. This isn't really something telling you what to do and certainly not how to do it, but this is some friendly advice from a young wife that just made it through their first year and knows she doesn't know everything. 

Quickie Post~

I have been having these strange moods where I'm just sad all of a sudden. Not like with my depression, but just sad. It's not the same empty and useless feeling as depression, so I don't understand it. I'm kinda just blaming it on pregnancy mood swings, but I haven't really had any of those anyway. It could just be me misinterpreting stress or worry, but did anyone else have those? Someone to relate to would be nice. 

Onto some nicer topics! 

I get to go out today and take care of some legal crap..... bleh.... But it is necessary, since my maiden name is still on my SSC as well as insurance, meaning that's what would end up on the baby's birth certificate, and well.... we don't want that. I'll also be taking my computer with me, so I'll post something actually interesting later on today. Maybe some drawings or something. Yeah. For now, I will get David's lunch ready and get myself ready to go as well. Hope everyone has a great day and a great time doing whatever it is you guys do. 

Nursery: Am I done yet!?

Hello everyone and welcome to the "Are you sure you have everything?" talk! Today we look at the topic, "But it isn't like all the ones I see online." 

That's my way of poking fun at something I'm finding very difficult at the moment; creating the nursery. Now, it seems pretty simple right? You need you're crib, changing station, and a dresser. Throw some cute stuff around the place and done! 

Haha....... I wish. I'm seeing now that I need a hamper for itty bitty clothes, a few cute storage containers, a larger trash can, something to organize my breastfeeding stuff on the table next to the rocker, a low watt light for leaving on at night, some curtains, a better place for stuffed animals, a place for toys, and pretty much a bunch of other things I really have no clue how to make fit. 

My husband and I were planning on having this room double as a sitting/craft room. Pfft, my beads and his yarn were already dominating all, so with the baby coming in they kinda lost their place. I stuck my beads in my closet, hoping once baby starts crawling around she won't get into them. His yarn is with the beads, but I'm pretty sure he'd love it out in the open. At least it's not getting dusty, right?

Anyway..... I really believe that this baby will not only stick to her room, but also pour out into the rest of the house. Like a cute and adorable roommate that can't change their own clothes or bathe alone........ 

Something else I need, a baby bath thingy. I've got plenty of towels ((thanks to everyone that's gifted them. Torah will love them!)) and I know I won't give her a bath until after the little belly button thing falls off, but it's still one of those things teasing me at the back of my mind. 

I learn from watching, then copying, then changing it up to were I can do it my own way. I still NEED that first experience of watching someone though! I couldn't even buy stamps at the post office on my own! It took forever to get me to order food in person, and I'm still more comfortable with the little talk boxes. I had to watch my mother in law wash a bathroom to know what she wanted me to do. I mean, if someone says, "Hey, could you wash the restroom?" I'm over here thinking, "How? Like, the toilet or the shower or do I have to mop or am I taking everything out, cleaning the walls, and then putting stuff back in? Do you want me to organize it or put things exactly where they were? Should I use the same cleaner for everything, should I not use a certain cleaner? What about a scrub brush? Should I use a washcloth, scrubbing brush, scrub sponge, normal sponge, or just a towel?" because I need a detailed list of what I'm supposed to do, or else I'll freak out and think I'm doing it wrong and then get frustrated and quit. 

Babies don't come with instruction manuals...............


--I apologize for going off on a rant, but hey, that's kinda what this is for. Doctor said to keep a journal to help my depression, so I'm blogging. Thanks for reading! If anyone has any advice on baby basics, NOT PARENTING STYLES, then I'd be happy to hear it and try it out and heed to it.--

P.S. No, like seriously, telling someone that having a bunch of onesies is very important is advice. Telling someone that they should breastfeed and formula feed instead of fully breastfeeding is telling them how to raise their kid. So, advice good! Pushing a certain parenting style on someone, BAAAAAAAD!!!!!!

Aiming for a Healthier Lifestyle

Today, my friend Kat and I went out to the gym to blow off steam for a bit. She talked about how she's trying to eat healthier, be more active, and just be better to her body overall. It got me thinking about the future and present, as well as the past. 

       In the future, I want to be a good example of healthy living to my children. I want to learn recipes that will have the nutrients needed, as well as the right amount of calories. I want them to know the fun in running, and the feeling you get when you see just how far you've gone. That accomplished feeling, knowing your body is capable of just a little bit more. I want my husband and I to do our best to keep up with our children, so that once they're older we will still be there for them. Exercise, in my opinion, is also a great bonding opportunity, specially between moms and teenage daughters.

       Right now, I realize that I must actually stay at the weight I am at. I am sad that I can't do my usual tae bo, and running, nor can I do any push ups or weights. I feel weak and vulnerable. I'm afraid that my muscles will forget what they're capable of and I will have to begin all over again. Not 75 sit ups a minute, but back to the 30 I started with. I will have to work my way back up to being able to do 25 push ups, 5 minutes of flutter kicks, all of the things I used to do! Everything I worked hard to even be able to do! Will I even still be able to run a mile in under 10 minutes!? I want to get in shape, and in the meantime, I want to stay healthy enough to give birth to the beautiful baby girl our family has been blessed with. 

       In the past I've been so careless about health. I ate whatever, whenever, and barely did I push myself. The only thing that made that change was my desire to show those people who called me weak, and those who said I couldn't do it, that I could join the Army, and that I could do whatever I wanted to. Sadly, I was not accepted into any of the branches, despite passing all of the physical requisites except for the Marines, due to having early arthritis and asthma. I had achieved my goal, yet it was taken from me by things I could not control. Arthritis runs in the family and shows up around age 13. Asthma was environmental, growing up in Southern Cali. 

       Yet, all of these things, these experiences, are now pushing me to want to change a few lifestyle habits I've tended to ignore before. I can stretch in the morning. I can do some abdominal exercises by laying on my back and just moving my muscles. I can dance around lightly and try to walk more. Take the longer route to where I'm walking, or just make two trips instead of one difficult one. Eat better, more fruit, things that will accelerate my metabolism. Encourage my husband to join me in this, as well as save up for a gym membership. I know he really wants a treadmill desk~

What Happened While I Was Gone?

              Since my last post was rushed, I thought it nice to actually chill, settle into a chair, and blog about what's been happening in the Rau lives.

              Well, let's start where I left off, which was sometime in July I believe. David and I had moved into our own apartment and he had started going to college. I still had my waitress job, and we were pretty close to home. It started going a bit downhill though, since I got laid off due to lack of business and he began to grow stressed. We had to deal with a lot of things, and go through some rough trials. I then started to feel weird and be really tired and such. I gained a bit of weight as well. We got some pregnancy test, I did them, and there they were, nice little red lines that confirmed I was pregnant. The 3 or so weeks following that were pretty alright, except the stress was increasing as well as we were running behind on payments. I began to get really sick, and we thought it would just pass and I'd be fine, but it didn't. I was too weak to even drink anything, and if I managed it it would just come back up anyway. He was left with all the house work as well as his schooling, and it became way too much. I attempted to get up and do things, but I would pass out randomly, throw up even with nothing in my stomach. I finally hit a point were my body and psyche couldn't take it anymore and gave into my depression. I saw no use in trying to get up or even in trying to keep myself alive, so I just stopped. The baby, sadly, just wasn't real enough to me yet. I was actually angry at it for not letting me have my life the way I wanted it. The apartment was a mess, my husband wasn't being taken care of, and everything was spiraling down. I wrongly blamed the baby, and then began to blame myself. I finally ended in a state that sent me to the hospital, about 4 times, with life threatening dehydration and lack of nutrients. We began to realize just how much we needed help at this point. 
            We let his parents know, and they helped us. We moved out of there and into their home after a bit, and that's where we are at the moment. They are wonderful people, and I can feel their love for me even if I'm not their "real daughter". David didn't go back for his next semester, and he de-stressed himself for a while before looking into getting a job. I began to throw up less, took chewy vitamins, which helped a lot, and was able to get back to a more or less healthy state. I was able to gain some of the weight I had lost back, about 25 or so pounds. He found a job he loves, and we're now saving for the future, and planning our lives a bit more diligently. I'm now at my original, pre-pregnancy weight at 8 months, and the baby is growing well. We are both so happy right now, and we can't wait to meet the little baby we've been watching grow for these past months. 
            
            I'm surrounded by friends and loved ones, and I know that everything will be alright, so long as I have faith in Heavenly Father, as well as in David's ability to guide his family. I might feel sometimes that I am too young to be a mother, and that this is stealing my life, but then I really think about it and realize that this is extending my life. Motherhood is going to bring more happiness than I ever imagined I could feel. I know that. I know it's a special thing us woman are capable of being. Mothers, they are caring and selfless, yet firm and strict. They are so wonderful, and I hope I can be the perfect mother for our kids. 

Baby!

        Just thought I should actually post something about the baby that's on the way, so here you guys go! 

             Husband and I have a little baby girl on the way, I'm currently 8 months, due date is on July 5th, and the shower- as well as my 20th birthday- is tomorrow! Woop! I will post a bunch of pictures later as well, tagged as- wait, can I tag things?- tiny clothes, baby gifts, baby, and cuteness.

This stuff was from an amazing friend of mine that has helped me spiritually throughout this, as well as physically, by making me some meals and such earlier in the pregnancy when I was having some serious issues.